I read this newsletter that came into my inbox from my husband Peter (Blackbelt In Excellence) and I thought it worthwhile sharing this with you. The principles and stories can relate to both your business and personal journeys and hope you are as inspired as I was when I read it! ENJOY
OK, what’s stopping you?
Hello, it’s Peter Thurin again. I hope you’ve got everything that you wish for and are doing everything that you want. If not, refer to the subject line of this newsletter.
“What’s stopping you?”
In this issue:
What’s stopping you?
Rob … You are an inspiration!
What’s stopping you?
The fact is that sometimes lots of things stop us from achieving our dreams. And guess what the most common one is? No, not bad luck or the wrong advice or the economy or the government or the kids or the boss or our busy lives. Do you know what the most common cause of people achieving way less than they could/might/should/were-born-for might be?
So, some thoughts this month about the most common form of failure known to man(kind). Firstly, I have to say that I’m really inspired by my good mate Nick, and it’s his challenges that have started me thinking about excuses, and not living out our full potential.
Nick was the absolute best he could be. In his field, the equivalent of a black belt. And in fact, it was a martial art that he excelled in. Two, actually: boxing and kickboxing. Nick was a world champion kickboxer and ranked #7 in the world as a boxer. How’s that for a talent? Nick was given to me as a gift about six years ago. In fact, I actually used to corner for him when he was fighting professionally. These days, he comes around to my house every Wednesday morning at an ungodly hour, we clear out the garage, and I pay him to belt the living suitcase out of me!
At the moment I’m working with Nick on the next phase of his life journey. As a retired boxer/kickboxer, with a new wife and a baby on the way at Christmas, Nick’s great challenge now is to establish his next career – as a boxing teacher and personal trainer. But what’s exciting is that THERE’S NOTHING STOPPING HIM!
Here’s what I know. And it’s the same for you as it is for Nick. Nick’s got skills. He’s got disciplines. He’s been all the way to the top. Can you imagine what he put himself through – hours on the road running, early mornings every day for years, jumping endless rope, throwing countless punches at a bag and at sparring partners (who hit back), doing whatever it took to achieve his goal. And he’s been a world champion!
What Nick’s doing now is taking all those same disciplines that propelled him to the top and applying them to his new life. And I already know how successful he’s going to be, because he’s already got the skills, he’s got the desire, he’s got the commitment. As I like to say, he’s in the game.
What about you? Think back to something in your life that you’re proudest of, something that you set your heart and mind and very being on achieving, and which you accomplished. Did you let excuses get in your way? Did you let anything stand in your way? Of course you didn’t. You were single minded, focused and determined to have/do/be whatever it was that was lighting your fire. One of my mates devoted every single ounce of his energy for months on end to wooing the new girl he’d just met. Nothing would stop him. He also most literally swept her off her feet. They’ve now been married for 24 years, with two fantastic kids. Another good friend spent about three years pursuing his desperate and urgent goal to break 80 on a golf course. Early morning practice sessions, lessons, equipment … he was playing 5 days a week. His eyes still fill up as he describes the sound of the ball dropping into the hole on the 18th for a 79. (And he went right out the next day and shot 77.)
So now, there are new goals in your life, yes? Maybe in your workplace? In your family? There’s a personal fitness level you want to achieve, a weight you’re aiming to be, a marathon you want to run? Well, let me ask you – are you just interested in that goal, or are you really committed? Are you in the game, like Nick? Or are you trotting out the same old excuses?
Rob … You are an inspiration!
My friend Rob just wrote to me. And I mean WROTE. 1697 words. And the most awesome 1697 words I’ve ever received. Here’s a cut and paste of what he had to say. Rob’s a builder, and a bloody good one. A few weeks ago I gave him a copy of my book, “Be the Best You Can Be”. As you’ll learn, Rob was pretty good at excuses.
“Who is this guy and why is he writing this book”, you asked early in your book. More importantly “Who am I and why am I reading it?”.
Two reasons, firstly I watched your “YouTube” video and was more than impressed by what I saw so I was naturally interested in looking into your product in more depth, and secondly you found it in your more-than-generous heart to give me a copy.
And who am I? I’m Rob. Happily married to Kelly with two boys Tim 13 and Billy 11. Live in Gisborne and build houses for a living.
September 1 2008 will live in my memory for ever. Why? Because that was the day we made a deal. You, Peter, will give me a copy of your book to enjoy and in return I will learn what your favored charity is all about and will make comment on the one (or more) things I learn from your book.
Peter, unfortunately I am all that is good …. and bad …. about your book. First, the good. Grand final day 2004. Brisbane v Port Adelaide I remember it like it was yesterday. I was out the back cooking on the barby at half time. Standing there necking a stubby and having a cigarette and chatting with mates when my youngest came over and asked if we could have a kick of the footy before the game restarted. As I lit another fag I told him I was busy and we might have a kick a bit later on. After the game he again asked if we could go out for a kick and again I said in a minute mate, to which he replied “why don’t you go out and have a cigarette and I’ll kick the ball to you”. I nearly threw up. My “sense of purpose” was a no brainer. We not only went to the local footy ground for a kick instead of the back yard, but my pack of cigarettes went straight in the bin. I did not want my sons associating kicking the footy (or any exercise for that matter) with smoking . I havent touched one since. So I know when I put my mind to something I can achieve… But…
Now for the bad. Remember the taxi driver in your book… well that is me, as well. Twenty years ago I told my father I was going to do the “Big M Melbourne Marathon”. Five years ago I told my wife I was going to do the “Round The Bay In A Day” bike ride and I think you know full well how I fared in both. Yep, I was “gunna…. gunna do this… gunna do that…” For god’s sake I even bought the bike… yep, its still in the box.
Peter, I have an excuse for every thing. Yesterday after you gave me the book I got home put it on the table and had dinner with the family. We chatted about our day and about the upcoming weekend, I then told Kelly I was going to walk down to the post office box to get the mail, its only a km each way so its no big deal. I took one step outside the back door and decided it was too cold to walk down into town… so I drove. A couple of hours later I started reading your book… “EASY TO DO… EASY NOT TO DO”. Then it dawned on me… you wrote this book about me. My favorite excuse was “if I didn’t do this job (carpentry.. Physical work) for a living I’d be a real porker”. Without really ever thinking about it, I had been justifying my gut size on the fact that im doing well, cause in reality it could be even bigger than it is now. In effect being slightly overweight was an achievement, compared with being a lot over weight. Its bulldust. Enough is Enough.
DO I HAVE A GOAL… of course I do, albeit short term one
s at this stage. Im going to QLD later this year and I wanna be able to take my shirt off without embarrassing my wife and kids and without making anyone else throw up.. That is my short term goal… long term goals are to sustain weight loss for longevity of life and lifestyles. To do the bike ride… To do the marathon… To be able to keep up with my kids. It is my black belt.
And at work? Well, Pete, in the past I have been the type of bloke that would go out and buy a dog and then bark for it. Meaning I really hadn’t had the confidence to allow people that I work with the freedom to be creative in their own way. I thought “why let them do it their way when I knew my way was better” (or so I thought), so I would do it for them. They will never get to be the best they can be if I don’t allow them and encourage them… and nor will I.
Remembering back only now I can recall my old man saying to me one day “that’s a different way of doing it than im used too. I’ll remember that for next time” Dad taught me what being humble was all about.
In essence Peter I have learnt that anything is possible. Although I probably already knew that, you have shown the footpath that needs to be taken to achieve my goals and as small as they may be at the moment I now believe in myself enough that I can put in place the structures that are required to achieve. To achieve any thing. To be the best that I can be. Or maybe even better.
As I have mentioned I have been on both sides of the fence. Quit smoking and never went back to it and on the other hand I’ve been the taxi driver. My inspiration will always be my family but my motivation will need to come from with in. It has been instilled in me by you, but will be executed by me. I no longer want to be a red belt, thinking that close enough is pretty good without ever getting to the summit of the mountain. Each time I get to the summit I will re-evaluate and re-define my goals. To aim higher and higher.
Tonight I took the bike out of the box. It was a bit dusty but looks strong enough to carry me on the start trek that will end up being ridden all the way to the summit… TO MY BLACK BELT IN EXCELLENCE.
P.S C.A.R.E. actually means Carpenters Are Really Everything
How good is it possible for one man to feel? Thanks, Rob.
(But you KNOW I’m gonna hold you accountable, my friend. I wanna share the glory of that mountain top with you.)
Blackbelt in Excellence Book and CD available
I just heard from my dear friend Andrew Blode, the Chairman of ACCYO, my favourite charity in the whole world. As you’d know, I’m sure, ACCYO is the Australian Council for Children and Youth Organisations. Part of the proceeds of every copy of my book “be the best you can be” go to the wonderful people at ACCYO.
Well, Andrew’s beside himself (two of him… scary thought!) The new Governor-General of Australia, Her Excellency Quentin Bryce, has agreed to accept the position of patron of ACCYO.
Like Nick the boxer, like Rob the builder, like Quentin the Governor-General: it’s all about being the “BEST YOU CAN BE”.
Let me know about your successes too. I’d love to share them with our online community.
Until next time, may the weeks ahead be magnificent for you. Don’t forget to email me any time at firstname.lastname@example.org
And here’s how to order yourself copies of my book. (How many can I send you??) Or maybe the audio CD I put together with radio marvel Peter Byme – a fantastic way to absorb success principles on the move.
Click here to book Peter Thurin
And remember, I’m always happy to work one-on-one with you too.
blackbelt in excellence specialises in:
Conference, seminar and workshop facilitation
Coaching and mentoring
Team building through martial arts activities
To your success. Be the best you can be.
and the blackbelt in excellence team
61 407 568 416